30-year-old woman blocks male coworker for “being distant” after she stepped back to appease her jealous boyfriend, and still expected casual friendly office small talk: '[She] blocked me for respecting the distance she created'

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  • Two colleagues reviewing a laptop and documents while standing in a modern office hallway.
  • My Coworker Blocked Me on Everything for Respecting Her Relationship

    I'm a guy in my 30s working in education in LA. Some time ago, a female coworker (same age as me) invited me out with other colleagues. and we all became friends.
  • She'd mention that her boyfriend didn't like her hanging out with male coworkers. I'd suggest she invite him along, but she said he'd never want to join ―he just preferred she not spend time with us.
  • She'd vent, I'd give neutral advice like "I'm sure you two can work it out." Never suggested they break up, never made a move.
  • Eventually she ghosted the group chat and stopped coming to hangs. I respected it- stopped texting first, stopped talking to her unless she spoke to me first.
  • Months pass. At a work banquet she pulls me aside, says she misses being friends and feels I've been distant.
  • I lied and said I hadn't noticed. She then tells me her boyfriend went through her phone, saw a photo of me in her car (completely innocent), and blew up.
  • Two coworkers discussing data on a laptop during a meeting in a modern office while colleagues review charts in the background.
  • She said he was right to be upset. Their relationship is still rocky almost two years later.
  • Then the twist: she said she blocked me on social media during that time- not because of him, but because \I\ stopped talking to her.
  • I was tipsy and just said I didn't notice but appreciated her telling me. She joked that I don't have to change, just say hi at staff meetings.
  • So now I do. I'm polite if she initiates, but keep it strictly professional. We've never dated or flirted.
  • I have no interest in her romantically. Her boyfriend's never met me, so I only know her side.
  • Just funny. She pulled away because of her relationship, got upset when I gave her space, then blocked me for respecting the distance she created.
  • Anyone else been through this?
  • crackersucker2 She had a whole relationship with you in her head. You indifferently dodged a bullet.
  • koolandtheblackbird Original Poster's Reply Maybe I was an option for her to monkey branch and I (thankfully) didn't bite or pay attention.
  • PTBAFC24601 "More red flags than at a parade in China." Trying out a new metaphor What do you think?
  • koolandtheblackbird Original Poster's Reply That's tough, I like it lol
  • crackersucker2 Pretty sure she would have either used your "interest" for drama with her man, or broken up with him. Either option is a huge NO. I find it hilarious she blocked you because you weren't bothering her
  • koolandtheblackbird Original Poster's Reply Seriously, that's the part that tripped me out. We used to talk all the time, but when she made distance I thought I was respecting a boundary because maybe she was going through something. She said she blocked me because "if you don't want to talk to me, fine, I'll make it easy for you." I'm thinking 'Did I not choose the most respectful option? What am I missing here, bro?' Lol
  • FishDispenser2 Sounds like she's in a toxic relationship, one one hand trying to please him while liking you too.
  • koolandtheblackbird Original Poster's Reply Could be true. And at the end of the day, she is choosing to be with this person. Hope the best for both os them.
  • myaccwasshut4norsn My Coworker Blocked Me on Everything for Respecting Her Relationship[] (https://www.reddit.com/r/coworkerstories/? f=flair_name%3A%22Ongoing%2FReal%20Time%22) I'm a guy in my 30s working in education in LA. Some time ago, a female coworker (same age as me) invited me out with other colleagues and we all became friends. She'd mention that her boyfriend didn't like her hanging out with male coworkers. I'd suggest she invite him along, but she said he'd never want to join ―he jus
  • koolandtheblackbird Original Poster's Reply Hahaha perfect response to the most redditor comment ever.
  • Past-Rip-3671 Basically OP you dodged, not a bullet, but a whole a cannon ball. She was hoping to have an affair with you and got mad when you didn't take the bait. Good for you, and I'd continue to keep it strictly professional with her. You never know when her hubby could turn up just to make sure.
  • koolandtheblackbird Original Poster's Reply My friends always joke that I am oblivious when someone is coming on to me. Fine, but it keeps me out of trouble I guess LOL
  • Character-Theory4454 did I just read?
  • koolandtheblackbird Original Poster's Reply LMAO at the person who copied and pasted XD
  • Palm TreeVoid If the guy is this toxic and jealous, you know that relationship is not gonna last either way.
  • koolandtheblackbird Original Poster's Reply To be honest, I don't think poorly of the guy. I think his biggest issue is fighting for someone who asks her coworkers if she should leave him every time they have an argument. I think self respect is more of his issue than insecurity. That's just me.
  • Get_Nice_69 Sounds crazy....don't dip your pen in the company ink!!
  • koolandtheblackbird Original Poster's Reply For sure, I even thought her asking me if she should leave him was too much.
  • koolandtheblackbird Original Poster's Reply Sheesh. Don't date a medical professional. Got it. Lol

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